If Only I Were Twelve 
Sadly, I find myself saying those words often... Sure, I have the mentality of a twelve year old, but that doesn't help me get cheaper tickets at the movies, happy meals, or lolipops at the doctors. But the reason I really want to be twelve today is that apparently now they have Video Game Camp! What the hell? They didn't have video game camp when I was growing up. I want to go to video game camp, but they won't let me, because apparently they only take kids in grades 5-12. Talk about your all time bummers. Sure, I went to computer camp. We'd spend 8 hours a day writing computer programs and 8 hours a day playing computer games and making up bizarre stuff like this, but at least computer camp had the good sense to trick our parents into thinking that we'd do more than play video games. We'd computer, or something. This camp has no such shame. I can only imagine the sheer video game lunacy of this camp. The website is pretty crappy. I couldn't find pricing or age restrictions on there. So I did some investigating and one of the sessions is at Hofstra, so I checked out Hofstra's website and they had this information:

Grades 5 through 12
10 Saturdays: June 26 - September 11, 9am-1pm
$799 for 40 hours of instruction

Best $800 I will spend. I mean, I wish I could spend. Craziness I tell you. Absolute craziness. The next thing you know there will be video game college. If you're interested in learning more, read about the camp at IGN.