Good News for Booze Hounds 
Drinking may in fact make you smarter. At least that's what the UK's Telegraph reported on Sunday: Alcohol sharpens your brain. According to a study that was to be released today, "those who even drink only one glass of wine a week have significantly sharper thought processes than teetotallers." But what's even better is that "those who downed the equivalent of half a bottle of wine or two pints of beer a day scored best of all." Hey, I've been touting this news for years now. Weed out the weak brain cells so the strong ones can survive and propagate. But now science has finally proved my genius. I tracked down what I think is the actual study: Whitehall II Study which states on page 16:

We found that consuming small amounts of alcohol had a protective effect on heart disease and cognitive function. . . . The benefits of alcohol are more strongly experienced by those who prefer to drink wine, but are also found for those who drink beer or spirits.

And that's all I have to say about that.